Monday, June 07, 2010

Entrepreneurs, Don’t suffer from B.H.S. - Battered Housewife Syndrome

Battered Housewife Syndrome

I used to work with this older guy who had seen it all and done it all…..twice in fact. He used to say "at the end of the day, all this is, is a bunch of guys playing factory. "

That is a true statement. Part of what holds people in their current surroundings is the fact that they get caught up in all of the hype. They build their 9 to 5 jobs into something that absorbs all of their time and energy. It becomes this enigma that is used to impress your family and friends. At my job people walk around like they are ER Doctors! Their families think they are out saving the world. We make Sun Tan lotion for crying out loud. People are wheeling in bags filled with binders and laptops, we have teleconferences, nightly conference calls and enough meetings to design the next I-PAD.

Part of me understands the hype. I mean really, who wants to come home at the end of the day and tell their wives that they spent the day filling out paperwork, doing expense reports, typing emails and copying and pasting regurgitated crap into Power Point presentations. Ha ha…..I just summed up 85% of my job right there

A real man wants to say, "Honey, I rolled out my new Corporate restructuring program and the board loved it. I just got the corner office with the bathroom and a 10% increase”

Our job as future millionaires is not to get caught up in our jobs. This doesn't mean don’t kill it. You still have to be the best (don’t be a scape g.o.a.t), but don't waste unnecessary time obsessing over it or expelling extra emotional energy that can be used to achieve your dreams.
During a recent interview with Puff Daddy. He explained how he used to clean bathrooms during his unpaid internship. At the end of that statement, he said that he was "the best" at it. That's the mind frame that we have to keep. That's the perfect analogy. He knew he would move on to bigger and better things but he still had to be the best at what he did. I'm sure at the end of the day, he didn't call himself a Sanitation Engineer, or a commercial disinfectionist. He wanted to diminish the effect that this job had on his life. He was about to start Bad Boy records, Sean Jean clothing line and produce a slew of number 1 albums and TV shows and be one of the most famous people in Entertainment. Do you think he let that job be any bigger in his mind then it needed to be. Yeah, the bathrooms stunk, it was a filthy, $hitty job (Pun intended) and he hated it, but all the complaining, and getting angry would be a waste. He was a kid cleaning bathrooms and gave it the energy it deserved, not a ounce more. His energy was spent on bigger and better things.

Honestly I find myself taking crap from the job I have every day.  Although I make a decent living, it's far below my capabilities but I gave up caring to the point where I let it affect me one ounce more then it needed to. I gave my last job everything I had and what did it get me…..a pink slip. A foot in the ass out the door. A one way trip to the parking lot, without so much as a severance check. All the extra hours, the skipped vacations and the thinking about the well being of everyone in that place just to get laid off. 

If I let that happen again, I would be just like a battered wife. (I realize I'm a man, but stay with me for the analogy).  Just because I’m getting a check now, I’m supposed to be romanced back into thinking that I need this man named job….thinking that I love this (man)job, thinking that I’m nothing without this (man)job. Then the moment that I think everything is...
 OK…..SLAP! what happens. I get (abused) fired again, and the cycle starts over.

But I’m much smarter then that. Slap me once and I call the cops and cut your balls off! You dig?
I’m like the once battered housewife who has come to her senses. I understand that I’m independent and the only way to completely free myself is to work outside of the job and slowly develop myself. So now my job sees me every day and thinks that I love him. I play the role, but I’m emotionally detached. He doesn’t have a clue. I use him for his money, his benefits, and material comforts. Now when I get yelled at, or berated or made to do chores that I don’t agree with, I’m laughing inside because I’m secretly plotting. I’ve actually stepped up my game so he is not suspicious of anything. He’s keeping me so busy, how could I ever be doing anything else or seeing anyone else. He’s so cocky now he doesn’t even think that I would ever consider leaving him. But while no one is looking – I’m studying, I’m developing, I’m learning, I’m training, reading and working hard. I’m up until 3:00 AM making it happen and I’m awake in the morning with everyone else. It’s the emotional detachment from the job and the emotional attachment to my independence that keeps the fire burning. All of the energy that I used to waste getting frustrated, complaining to my friends, family and co workers about my job is now converted into action. The closer I get the hotter the fire and desire burns until one day – I have enough money, knowledge and security to break free. Without any notice – I’m gone! I’m not worried about job, he will find some other poor bastard to take my place and I feel sorry for that person, but I’m gone.  I will send the next poor guy a link to this post.

Project X is my freedom, FTB Inc. is my security, and I can taste it.

Let’s Go!!
An FTB Bloggers Blog

Project X is a software program that I’m developing while trying to run and maintain all my other lines of business: FTB Bloggers, Wash and Roll, Nuff Said Outfitters; Money Saving Mikes Online Gifts. Tune in weekly for updates on my progress and for words of inspiration!

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