Monday, August 14, 2006

THE LAWS OF POWER II

NEVER PUT TOO MUCH TRUST IN FRIENDS, LEARN HOW TO USE ENEMIES

Our friend Robert Greene states, "Be wary of friends- they will betray you more quickly, for they are easily aroused to eny. They also become spoiled and tyrannical. But hire a former enemy and he will be more loyal than a friend, because he has more to prove. In fact , you have more to fear from friends then from enemies. If you have no enemies, find a way to make them".

Hmmm! I am very mixed on this one. I have frineds that I have hired and I have made friends with people that work with me and for me. I believe that the term friend is used loosley in this law. It is from my experience that a true friend with every sense of the word has your best interest in mind and heart. There is no way to really stop a friend from becoming jealous, but a true friend will be happy becuase you are happy. Your success and joys are shared. Jealousy is translatted to self improvement for that friend, not friend destruction.

Now, associates and friends are often used interchangebly. This person can use jealousy to fuel destruction. Associates are just that, they are associated with you through common circumstances, and have no problems watching themelves get ahead at your expense. The difference between an associate and a coworker is very little. You might occasionally eat luch with, or even attend a dinner party with an associate, but you are not or should not go to far in trusting them. Don't confuse daily conversation, and a Christmas card with friendship. Friendship goes much deeper then that.


Let's read more from the expert, "It is natural to want to employ your friends when you find yourself in times of need. The world is a harsh place, and your friends soften the harshness. Besides, you know them. Why depend on a stranger when you have a friend at hand? The problem is that you often do not know your friends as well as you imagine. Friends often agree on things in order to avoid an argument. They cover up their unpleasant qualities so as to not offend each other. They laugh extra hard at each other's jokes. Since honesty rearely strenthens friendship, you may never know how a friend truly feels. Friends will say that they love your poetry, adore your music, envy your tase in clothes - maybe they mean it, often they do not. When you decide to hire a friend, you gradually discover the qualities he or she has kept hidden. Strangely enough, it is your act of kindess that unbalances everything." " The more favors and gifts you supply to revive the friendship the less gratitude you recieve. "


I think being successful you have to have a talent for looking into peoples' personalities and spotting weaknesses. Once they are spotted they can be managed for your success. This is a tactic that I use, that I must use at work daily.


"Working with friends confuses the boundaries and distances that working requires. But if both partners in the arrangement understand the dangers involved, a friend often can be employed to great effect. You must never let your guard down in such a venture, however; always be on the lookout for any signs of emotional disturbance such as envy and ingrattitude. Nothing is stable in the realm of power, and even the closet of friends can be transoformed into the worse of enemies."


-MJL

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